Dealing with the Christmas Grinch

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I have to admit I don’t really know the story of How The Grinch Stole Christmas.  I have the general gist that The Grinch is a mean, grumpy guy who doesn’t like Christmas a lot and wants to make sure no one else has a good time either.

However, this Christmas I seem to be dealing with my own personal Grinch and it’s turning out to be me.

Maybe it’s because I don’t have a bunch of little ones to prepare for.  Maybe it’s because I really don’t get into all the parties and the non-stop eating and socializing.  Maybe it’s because this whole season just seems so damn artificial with it’s non-stop Christmas carols, “Peace on Earth and Goodwill Toward Men” stuff.

It seems that the closer the actual day gets, the more grinch-y I become.  I don’t know.  Maybe I need to force myself to have a better attitude about it. Fake it ‘tiol you make it and all that happy stuff.

Maybe.

The Grinch Song

Partied Out

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A beautiful Christmas place setting with poinsettia plant.I must be getting old.

I used to be able to keep up a hearty schedule of work, party, party, work, home, sleep. No more. It seems that I just get too tired too quickly. I’m also getting tired of eating so much.

Gasp.

That’s a shocker.

I used.to be a prodigious eater. Still am in many ways. But going to parties night after night or sometimes afternoon party followed by evening party is starting to satiate me to the point of saturation.

Here’s a confession, too. I’m not as good a mingler as I used to be. I don’t remember names as well as I should. I’m embarrassed when people come up to me and know me or, at least, know my name and I don’t really remember them.

Pretty sad, huh?

Sometimes I  even say, ‘Hi, I’m Ken.” The go,”Yeah, I know you.” and then don’t introduce themselves back since if they know me I should obviously know them.

It’s more than the recognition thing, though. Sometimes I just don’t know what to talk about. Yeah, we got war stories to share and the “Are you ready for Christmas, yet?” which is kind of like “Nice weather we’re having, huh?”  Beyond that, I lose interest.

I don’t really care about the kids or their car problems. I know I should. I’m a “people person”. I should be out there building relationships, a network, friends. But, for some reason, my heart just isn’t in it.

The other part (and this has to do with getting old) is that my hearing isn’t what it used to be. If I’m in a large room with lots of people and there’s music and talking,and all kinds of carrying on, I can barely hear what you’re saying to me even if you’re right next to me. I do my best to catch the key words and the thrust of what’s coming out of your mouth but, the sad truth is, sometimes I don’t understand it.  It’s like you’re talking a foreign language.

But the big thing is the food.  I do’t drink so I don’t even catch a buzz. I put stuff in my mouth that shouldn’t go in there and the scale reminds me the next morning. I also have a feeling it’s not helping my general outlook on life. You know that sluggish feeling, bloated, slow, tired.

Bottom line: I just about partied out. For real.

Vacations

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This is the time of year a lot of people take off.  It’s only natural.  There’s lots of stuff to do.  Family to visit. Last minute shopping.  Of course, you don’t want to take off too much or you miss all the office parties. Gotta make the office parties!

It’s also the time of year to kinda plan ahead for next year.  Not too much, you understand. Maybe just enough to get an idea or a general outline of a kind.

Lately, I’ve been talking to the Missus about a long time dream.  Taking a real vacation.

Usually, when I go places it’s because there is a conference somewhere.  It’s great because I can write it off my taxes but it’s a little inhibiting because the time really isn’t my own. I have to sit through the actual conference part. It also involves a lot of networking with other conference attendees – meals together, drinks, etc. All in the name of promoting business.

The vacation is a nice break from all work. At least that’s the theory. No workshops or speeches or lunches or anything. Stay up late or go to bed early. Visit the touristy hot spots. Take some time at the spa. Maybe check e-mail once a day. Unplugging will be the hardest part for me.

The Missus has finally agreed to take a trip to Asheville, NC in 2012. It’s a nice little town in the mountains on North Carolina with the Biltmore as the biggest draw.  It’s really a nice, artsy craftsy town, too. Lots of local artisans that make lots of interesting stuff. Good music. I even found an interesting place to stay – The Grove Park Inn. It has a lot of history in and of itself and looks like it might be a fun place to stay.

Yeah. It might be a little pricey but if I play my cards right and watch my pennies, I might be able to put enough money aside to do it up right.

That’s the thing about vacations.  They cost money.  Too bad.  But I’m not really all that interested in “roughing it” anymore. I’m getting way too old for that.  Plus, since this will be the first real vacation in probably a decade or longer, it’ll be nice to enjoy it.

 

The End of Leftovers

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Apple PieAhh. It’s only Saturday and the last of the leftovers has been devoured.

I’ll admit there wasn’t a lot. That’s the problem with eating Thanksgiving dinner somewhere else. You get a little CARE package or doggie bag or whatever you want to call it but it’s stuff that’s rationed out among you and the other guests. The lion’s share stay’s with the host and hostess.

As nature intended it.

Of course, the upside to this arrangement is that:

  1. we didn’t have to cook Thanksgiving dinner (just some of it)
  2. we didn’t have to prepare our house for the guests
  3. we didn’t have to clean up after it was all over
So, the goodly amount of leftovers we did get to take home is one more thing to be thankful for. At least we had another nice dinner on Friday and some desserts into Saturday.
Hey, it’s all good…except for the calories.

Let The Parties Begin

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Party timeNow that we have Thanksgiving out of the way and Black Friday is coming to a close, it’s time to start planning those Christmas Holiday Season parties. If you’re not giving one, surely you’ve been invited which means you have to plan your itinerary. You may want to plan a little exercise in there, too.

I’ve never quite figured out why the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas (Yes, Christmas – as in December 25th) is filled with so many parties and the like.  We’re talking parties at the j-o-b, parties given by people or companies that sell stuff to you (if you’re self employed like me) or to your company. Of course, making the invitation list if you’re just a worker bee is a little tougher.

Still.  There are plenty of parties to go around. Your friends. Your family. Your neighbors. Your church. Everyone is partying down with booze and food.  It’s really the only time of year you can get away with this kind of stuff.

The forced camaraderie and fellowship and “Good will toward men” and “Peace on Earth” and all that stuff is a little much to take. Especially in light of the fact that the wars go on, crime persists.  Even petty arguments and diabolical plans to get mine before you get yours. It’s enough to make you want to scream.

You would think that people who want your business would be nice to you all year long and ply you with little goodies and stuff just for the heck of it. You would think that you might socialize a little more with your neighbors, co-workers and the rest.  But we don’t.  At least, I don’t.

The other part of this is the week between Christmas and New Year’s (let’s not even talk about New Year’s Eve, yet). Everyone is comatose from all the food and liquor and the shopping frenzy either online or at the mall that they just want the world to stop. Oddly, it pretty much does during that week. Some employers even shut down that week and give everyone a forced vacation.

Now we are entering the party zone. Only the most strong willed among us can turn down all the parties or the family gorge fest on or around Christmas.

Get ready to pack it on and then pack it in. Let the parties begin.

Thanksgiving 2011

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A Big Dinner Spread for The HolidaysSometimes it seems there is little to be thankful for:

  • economic turmoil
  • two wars
  • drought
  • famine

…and those are just some of the things affecting parts of the world I don’t live in. Closer to home there is the ridiculous economic troubles, a dysfunctional political system, crime, hunger and on and on.

Yet, this is the day we’re suppose to reflect on the things in our lives to be thankful for. To be sure, there is plenty to go around…

My Home

Sure. I have negative equity like lot of other people. That means I can’t sell my house. I can’t even refinance to get a good interest rate. Still, I can afford to have a house complete with heat and A/C, indoor plumbing, a nice kitchen and a nice yard. I’m not planning on moving so, for now, I’m thankful I have a nice place to live.

My J-O-B

I’m really self employed but it’s still like a job.  The important part is that it brings in some money so I can pay the mortgage on the aforementioned home and put some food on the table.  All in all, it’s one of the best jobs I’ve had in my lifetime.  I’ve had some real doozies. Some were not fun at all. At least, my current situation gives me some flexibility.

My Friends

Yep. Friends. Not quite like the old TV show where they pop by unannounced and unexpected every ten minutes or so but people I can call on for help or just hang out with to chew the fat or commiserate about the world. I got church friends, work-related friends, friends I’ve made through my association with my local Rotary club. It’s good to have friends even if they’re just acquaintances.

My Spouse

Yep. Got one of those, too. There’s a lot to be said for marriage. A lot for cohabitation, too.  I’m not one of those people who think you have to tie some legal knot to prove your undying love for one another. Heck with the divorce rate so high, I tend to think that marriage, itself, may be overrated. But, I am thankful for my wife and the fact that we’ve been together now for a long time. Hell, if you count the time we shacked up before we got married, it’s a real long time.

The Internet

God, where would we be without the Internet and blogs and Facebook and e-mail? We are now more connected than we ever were with more people from more places. Hell, you’re reading this blog post and I don’t even know it or who you are yet we are connecting or is it engaging? I always forget which.

So there is a lot to be thankful for and I am in a constant struggle with myself to remember that. It’s a good thing that there’s a special day set aside so I do remember.

The Value of Doing Nothing

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Forgive me if this isn’t exactly right.

“Do or not do. There is no try.” — Yoda

Sometimes it’s hard to distinguish between an activity that produces a good result and an activity that produces, at best, a neutral result. No result at all.

For me, an activity that holds out the promise of a good result is worth trying. It may even be worth trying twice, three times. If the activity doesn’t produce the good result anticipated or it turns out to be a waste of time, it’s time to cut bait.

This leads me to the value of doing nothing.

In my mind, sitting at home and reading or going to a movie or maybe just vegging out in the recliner beats the hell out of going somewhere and doing something that is supposed to achieve a certain result…but doesn’t.

It seems the we are pushed to be productive and engage in activities that “produce” certain results all the time. The latest is this trend to require retail store personnel to show up for work on Thanksgiving night for the mad Christmas rush. Of course, at the most fundamental level something like that is a real pain in the ass but it’s achieves a good result — pay for the store personnel and sales for the store. It’s not absolutely worse than nothing but it’s close.

What if the store didn’t pay an hourly wage but only paid you if something was sold…and no one came by. No one bought anything. Then it’s a waste of time. However, the personal development gurus would have you believe that one time does not the tale tell.  You need persistence, tenacity, perseverance, stamina. Just keep showing up and, sooner or later, something good will happen.

Maybe.

For my money, I would rather stay home. I have no desire to “tough out” long periods of many days. I guess that makes me impatient. It puts me into that immediate gratification category. Some might call it lazy.

Struggle

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There are people who move through life effortlessly with a smile on their face and a song in their heart. Others kinda muddle through one day to the next. Nothing great and wonderful but nothing overly tragic or debilitating.

For many, though, life is a struggle from one day to the next. Sure. There are the ‘good days” when things flow smoothly. Moods are good. The sun is shining. Most days are more of a fight.

The bodily aches and pains. Tooth aches, arthritis, overweight, tired, depressed. Just when you think you have it whipped and things will work out well, something comes along to remind you that The Book of Job was written with you in mind.

Patience is a virtue but it’s a virtue rarely rewarded. Perseverance, persistence, tenacity — all wonderful traits to have in the face of never ending adversity. But what is it that causes us to go on in the face of the seemingly unending challenges?

Some don’t, of course. Suicide is common.  Maybe not as common as we would think but more common than we might otherwise believe. Most people keep plodding through life without passion or purpose or even desire.  It has been snuffed out. Smothered.

The gurus would have us believe that this is all a trick of the mind. We control our thoughts and our thoughts control our destiny. But do they and can we?

Maybe there’s a trick to it that the gurus are holding back but for the nominal membership fee to their website or program. Kinda like the secret ingredient in your neighbor’s blue ribbon pecan pie. Yeah, she gave you all the ingredients for a passable pecan pie but she left out that one thing that made it the best pie at the County Fair.  That’s her secret. Her life.

You hear the old saying about being sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was like that once. It helped. I pulled myself back from the brink. I thought life would get better. Much better.

Maybe it did and I didn’t notice.

Morning Writer

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Truth be told, I think I’m probably a morning writer.  It goes with being a morning person.

The only problem is that I sometimes have a little trouble setting aside the time.  It’s not like I couldn’t. After all, the Missus is reading the paper and drinking coffee. She wouldn’t miss me. But I don’t. Or, at least, I haven’t.

So tomorrow, I have an early appointment and have to get out the door by about 7:30. The day after, earlier than that. So I may be able to get a few words in but if I really want to go nuts, I won’t have the time. Then by the time I get back and have the time, the ideas have flown out of my head just like the Rick Perry third thing and the thing with Herman Cain having lots of thoughts whirling around in his head.

Yeah, I know. Write the idea down. Or start a draft and come back to it. Simple solutions. But I don’t do that either. Maybe it’s so I can have an excuse or two or three. You know, it’s not my fault. I just couldn’t get around to it.  I forgot.

They say that the first step to recovery is awareness. Acknowledgement that their is a problem. Maybe so. But some of us can’t get past that first step. Awareness. Acknowledgement.

I’m fat. I need to eat right. Exercise. I’m aware. I don’t do anything.

I want more money. I need to work more productively. Take the actions that are tried and true and tested to get more income. I’m a little lax, there, too.

Write? Get up. Fire up the computer. Put on a cup of coffee. Come back to the computer and pound out some words. I’m working on it.

Trying to Write

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I keep trying to become a more consistent writer.  I have the stuff in my head.  I just can’t seem to get it into the blog.

Part of the challenge is that I read somewhere that Google doesn’t like blog posts less than 200 words.  That may not seem like very much but it can be daunting when I don’t have much to write about. Not that Google finds the blog anyway.  Although, there seems to be more commenting than over at my other blog, which has been suffering, too.

The I happened across one of those personal development “thoughts are things” blogs that are written to help sell webinars and other products to help make you rich, rich, rich.  It’s the Randy Gage Accept Your Abundance Prosperity Blog.

Randy writes on prosperity and the abundance mindset (and multi-level marketing) and he does it very consistently. Randy doesn’t always write a long blog post.  Sometimes it’s two or three paragraphs and that’s it.

Sometimes, Randy has lots to say and he’ll take the time to say it no matter how long it takes.

The bottom line is that I guess to be a writer one has to develop the discipline or habit of writing. Something I definitely need to work on whether it’s 200 words or 2000.